Yearly Archives: 2009

Must-read posting about… Free toaster

Posted on Friday, December 4, 2009 by No comments yet

I haven’t laughed this hard in awhile.  From Matt Gang in Burlington’s Old North End tonight on Front Porch Forum

Free toaster

Are you tired of your trust worthy toaster, tirelessly toasting your toast to the desired toastiness? Boring!!!

Are you ready for an adventure? My toaster won’t let you down. You won’t start every morning with loud expletives and a smoked filled kitchen, just enough mornings to keep you constantly paranoid, and your neighbors heavily invested in fire insurance. Yes sir, the folks at Silex Proctor really broke the mold with this one. This toaster doesn’t view it’s temp. dial as an order, more as a suggestion. Sometimes brown means it will burn your bread product to a point that would require dental records for identification. At other times brown means the moment after you exit the kitchen, it will fling the still white bread into the stratosphere. Sometimes brown means that it won’t even accept the toast, preferring to make a loud buzzing noise whenever it’s overly sensitive lever is depressed.

I’m sure that at this point most everyone is just waiting for information on where to pick up this little beauty, but my conscience requires me to unearth a few of it’s less redeeming qualities.

This toaster is possessed by several malignant spirits.
It may be a portal to hell.
It cannot stand bagels, british muffins, or any other bread products come to think of it.
It can shoot flames as far as it can hurl fiery hunks of crust.

Please, please, please, take my toaster. I’m afraid of what will happen if I throw it out. Don’t tell it that I wrote this.

Stove Proceeds go to Neighborhood Forum

Posted on Friday, November 20, 2009 by 1 comment

Jeannette in Huntington posts on FPF today…

Hello Neighbors, We have a seven year old “Frigidaire” brand gas cooking range for sale. White. Excellent condition. Oven takes 1 to 2 hours to heat up to temp. You will need to arrange pick-up. $50…all proceeds from sale will go to Front Porch Forum.

Thanks Jeannette!

Man vs. Coyote

Posted on Thursday, November 12, 2009 by 3 comments

We’ve been swamped with loads of postings on Front Porch Forum recently… about all sorts of topics.  This one Charlotte by Cheryl jumped off the monitor today…

Hi neighbors,  This is my first time posting. I wanted to let you all know that our neighbor’s small spaniel was snatched out of their backyard by a coyote this evening 11/12 about 6:00 pm. The owners were able to recover the pet by chasing the coyote across the fields behind our houses. We are on Mt Philo Rd north of the intersection of Hinesburg Rd. Please be careful of your pets. This is not the first time a coyote has come close to the houses. This one seems quite bold.

UPDATE:  And this just into FPF from Ann in South Williston…

Hi – I saw a coyote walking through Meadowridge yesterday (walking in the street) during the afternoon.  Are there an unusual amount tooling around?  Should we be concerned? I’ve never seen them strolling around neighborhoods before.

Traditional Media Covers FPF Member Appeal

Posted on Sunday, November 1, 2009 by 2 comments

Dan McLean wrote a solid piece about Front Porch Forum‘s first membership appeal for today’s Burlington Free Press.  Here’s the letter we sent to our local subscribers and the page where anyone can become an FPF supporting member.

Social media venues such as Front Porch Forum, which are offered as free services to the public, are not spared the fiscal realties of business. Revenues must exceed expenses… Founded in 2006 after operating informally under a different name for several years, Front Porch Forum is being forced to adapt, Wood-Lewis said. “As we grow, our business model is evolving,” Wood-Lewis wrote to the forum’s 16,000 “subscribers” in kicking off the “first annual member appeal”…

“We are grateful for our local business partners and their support of our community-building mission,” he wrote. “Their ads cover many of our expenses, but not all.”

While the Free Press did find a “social media expert” to offer criticism of FPF, they regrettably didn’t print comments on the matter from any of the thousands of local folks who use it daily.  I’ll cull some of those messages out of the neighborhood conversations to share in the next blog post.

UPDATE: This just in…

I disagree with the comment attributed to Joe Mescher in the article published on November 1st that FP forums “be shared more widely on the Internet instead of keeping the contents confined to each neighborhood.” The beauty of such “confinement” is knowing the information has relevance to me and my close neighbors. I occasionally submit information to my neighbors regarding actions of the Lake Iroquois Association – actions that matter to those near the lake and not necessarily to the residents of other areas or the Internet world at large. To remove such “confinement” just means everyone’s mailbox fills up with unwanted stuff – just another blog or tweet – stuff that I merely trash. The value of something like FPF becomes lost. I’m will support FPF financially and I strongly encourage others to do the same.

Keep up the great work, Michael.

Roger Crouse, President
Lake Iroquois Association