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	<title>Ghost of Midnight &#187; Humor</title>
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	<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com</link>
	<description>... about neighbors, community and Front Porch Forum</description>
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		<title>TMI?  Nah&#8230; B&amp;J&#8217;s is a special case&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2012/02/23/tmi-nah-bjs-is-a-special-case/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2012/02/23/tmi-nah-bjs-is-a-special-case/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 23 Feb 2012 23:12:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Community Management]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Front Porch Forum]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Local Online]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neighborhood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Raffle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vermont]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.frontporchforum.com/?p=2505</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[#VT - Last month Front Porch Forum gave away 60 pints of Ben &#38; Jerry&#8217;s ice cream to lucky raffle winners.  Today, one of them posted to her Pownal neighbors&#8230; You may be interested in the fun I had with the 12 pints of B &#38; J ice cream I won a few weeks ago: [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span style="color: #888888;">#VT -</span> Last month <a title="Helping neighbors connect." href="http://frontporchforum.com">Front Porch Forum</a> gave away 60 pints of Ben &amp; Jerry&#8217;s ice cream to <a href="http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2012/01/09/12-words-for-2012-fpf-raffle/">lucky raffle winners</a>.  Today, one of them posted to her Pownal neighbors&#8230;</p>
<blockquote><p><img class="alignleft" src="http://robertfreshmarket.net/images/products/detail/bandj.jpg" alt="" width="158" height="158" />You may be interested in the fun I had with the 12 pints of B &amp; J ice cream I won a few weeks ago:</p>
<p>Jan 16 &#8211; Cherry Garcia &amp; Heath Bar Crunch<br />
Jan 22 &#8211; FroYo Phish Food &amp; Half Baked<br />
Jan 30 &#8211; Friends invited me to lunch; I took dessert, Coffee Heath Bar &amp; Stawberry Cheesecake<br />
Feb 7 &#8211; Gave 2 pints to daughter-in-law at my birthday supper<br />
Feb 13 &#8211; What a Cluster &amp; Boston Cream Pie<br />
Feb 22 &#8211; Gave last 2 to g&#8217;son, who&#8217;s favorite is Cherry Garcia</p></blockquote>
<p>What if we all kept ice cream diaries?</p>
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		<title>Vermonters have many choices&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2012/02/16/vermonters-have-many-choices/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2012/02/16/vermonters-have-many-choices/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 17 Feb 2012 00:08:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Burlington]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Citizen Journalism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Civic Engagement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Clay Shirky]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Community Building]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Community Management]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Democracy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[e-Vermont]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Facebook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Front Porch Forum]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Knight Foundation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Local Online]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MacArthur Fellows]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neighborhood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[social capital]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Social Media]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Twitter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vermont]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.frontporchforum.com/?p=2486</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[#VT - Lots of great discussion of various online tools today at the e-Vermont workshop in Randolph.  I was blown away by first-hand accounts of  Moretown citizens responding to Hurricane Irene, as well as the folks of Westford self-organizing a food shelf to help neighbors in need. Vermonters have so many digital media tools in [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span style="color: #888888;"><img class="alignleft" src="http://e4vt.org/sites/default/files/evermont_logo.jpg" alt="" width="124" height="54" />#VT -</span> Lots of great discussion of various online tools today at the <a href="http://events.r20.constantcontact.com/register/event?llr=dub7qefab&amp;oeidk=a07e4ukimx50198cb79">e-Vermont workshop in Randolph</a>.  I was blown away by first-hand accounts of  <a href="http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2011/09/03/vermonters-rally-in-the-wake-of-irenes-devastation/">Moretown citizens responding to Hurricane Irene</a>, as well as the folks of <a href="http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2010/06/10/front-porch-forum-enables-westford-food-shelf/">Westford self-organizing a food shelf </a>to help neighbors in need.</p>
<p>Vermonters have so many digital media tools in the toolbox from which to choose.  That said, I&#8217;m partial to our <a title="Helping neighbors connect." href="http://frontporchforum.com">Front Porch Forum</a> for many applications.  Apparently Doris in Argyle, NY feels the same way (from her current posting)&#8230;</p>
<blockquote><p>Thanks to everyone who posted or emailed info about the Pleasant Valley public hearings, which my husband will attend tonight.  I was pleased to see that Front Porch Forum published the info in a timely manner.</p>
<p>It  occurs to me that one week of following FPF has given me more positive information and ideas than several years of trying to negotiate Facebook.  With Facebook I have struggled to figure out who is seeing what information and I have not gleaned much of anything from a world of &#8220;friends&#8221; except for gossip and a lot of negative interaction.  So, goodbye Facebook, and hello Front Porch Forum!</p></blockquote>
<p>And I&#8217;d be remiss if I didn&#8217;t <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PN2HAroA12w">share this bit about Twitter</a>&#8230; just in fun, of course&#8230;</p>
<p><a href="http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2012/02/16/vermonters-have-many-choices/"><em>Click here to view the embedded video.</em></a></p>
<p><strong>Update:</strong>  And from Carrie in Argyle&#8230;</p>
<blockquote><p>Doris, I agree&#8230;been thinking the same thing about getting rid of facebook. I love that the FPF news I hear is local!!! I feel so much more connected.</p></blockquote>
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		<title>Screeching like a trapped seagull in #BTV #VT</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2011/09/21/screeching-like-a-trapped-seagull-in-btv-vt/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2011/09/21/screeching-like-a-trapped-seagull-in-btv-vt/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 22 Sep 2011 01:05:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Burlington]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Front Porch Forum]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Local Online]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neighborhood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Social Media]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vermont]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.frontporchforum.com/?p=2128</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I think this is a FIRST for Front Porch Forum.  Posted by an FPF member in Burlington&#8217;s Old North End today&#8230; This morning, at about 1.30 a.m., my husband and I were ripped from coma-like sleep by a loud distress sound.  It sounded like it came from about 250 feet away, somehwere on the eastern [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I think this is a FIRST for <a title="Helping neighbors connect." href="http://frontporchforum.com">Front Porch Forum</a>.  Posted by an FPF member in Burlington&#8217;s Old North End today&#8230;</p>
<blockquote><p>This morning, at about 1.30 a.m., my husband and I were ripped from coma-like sleep by a loud distress sound.  It sounded like it came from about 250 feet away, somehwere on the eastern part of Walnut, up from Dot&#8217;s Market. The sound didn&#8217;t vary much in pitch. For about 15 minutes, we lay in bed speculating about its its source.</p>
<p>&#8220;I think its a possum or something. Perhaps an animal in a have-a-heart trap?,&#8221; speculated my husband.</p>
<p>&#8220;No, I think it is a seagull.  I bet its trapped in a dumpster or garbage,&#8221; I offered.</p>
<p>In his boxers, my husband left the house to help the poor animal.  He was back shortly after, with the sound was still carrying through the whole neighborhood.</p>
<p>&#8220;Not a seagull, Val. A mammal.  A **very happy** neighbor.&#8221; To maintain the G-rated spirit of Front Porch Forum, I will proceed by referring to the sound sources as the&#8221;trapped seagull&#8221; and the &#8220;seagull rescuer,&#8221; who was clearly already on the scene before my husband and I thought to help.</p>
<p>Trapped seagull:  I am happy for your late hour pleasure. I know this won&#8217;t be an issue in 4 weeks when we have to sleep with our windows closed, but it would be neighborly if you didn&#8217;t broadcast your coital bliss over such a wide distance.</p>
<p>Seagull Rescuer:  Trapped seagull is not being honest with you.  If a seagull were trapped for that long and were forced to give out a distress call at the volume for such a long time, she would, in real life, perish of exhaustion. Only in the movies do seagulls maintain that level of pleasure at that volume for 45 minutes.</p>
<p>Then again, maybe the rest of us are doing it wrong and seagull and rescuer are on to something.  Perhaps we can knock on their door and ask them next time we are treated to their pleasure sounds?</p></blockquote>
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		<title>Thou shalt not question Facebook</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2011/01/07/thou-shalt-not-question-facebook/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2011/01/07/thou-shalt-not-question-facebook/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 07 Jan 2011 15:33:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Facebook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Social Networking]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://frontporchforum.com/blog/?p=1737</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;m shocked that John Stewart would cast aspersions on our omniscient corporate overlord.  How dare he!  It&#8217;s imperative that we all march lock-step into Facebook&#8217;s warm embrace. The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon &#8211; Thurs 11p / 10c The Anti-Social Network www.thedailyshow.com Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor &#38; Satire Blog&#60;/a&#62; The Daily Show [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;m shocked that John Stewart would cast aspersions on <a href="http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/thu-january-6-2011/the-anti-social-network">our omniscient corporate overlord</a>.  How dare he!  It&#8217;s imperative that we all march lock-step into Facebook&#8217;s warm embrace.</p>
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<td style="padding:2px 1px 0px 5px;"><a style="color:#333; text-decoration:none; font-weight:bold;" href="http://www.thedailyshow.com" target="_blank">The Daily Show With Jon Stewart</a></td>
<td style="padding:2px 5px 0px 5px; text-align:right; font-weight:bold;">Mon &#8211; Thurs 11p / 10c</td>
</tr>
<tr style="height: 14px;" valign="middle">
<td style="padding:2px 1px 0px 5px;" colspan="2"><a style="color:#333; text-decoration:none; font-weight:bold;" href="http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/thu-january-6-2011/the-anti-social-network" target="_blank">The Anti-Social Network</a><a></a></td>
</tr>
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<td style="padding: 2px 5px 0px; width: 360px; overflow: hidden; text-align: right;" colspan="2"><a style="color:#96deff; text-decoration:none; font-weight:bold;" href="http://www.thedailyshow.com/" target="_blank">www.thedailyshow.com</a></td>
</tr>
<tr valign="middle">
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<td style="padding: 3px; width: 33%;"><a style="font:10px arial; color:#333; text-decoration:none;" href="http://www.thedailyshow.com/full-episodes/" target="_blank">Daily Show Full Episodes</a></td>
<td style="padding: 3px; width: 33%;"><a style="font:10px arial; color:#333; text-decoration:none;" href="http://www.indecisionforever.com/" target="_blank">Political Humor &amp; Satire Blog&lt;/a&gt;</a></td>
<td style="padding: 3px; width: 33%;"><a style="font:10px arial; color:#333; text-decoration:none;" href="http://www.facebook.com/thedailyshow" target="_blank">The Daily Show on Facebook</a></td>
</tr>
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</table>
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</table>
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		<title>IF YOU SEE THIS CAT, PLEASE DO NOT FEED HER</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2010/10/18/if-you-see-this-cat-please-do-not-feed-her/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2010/10/18/if-you-see-this-cat-please-do-not-feed-her/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 19 Oct 2010 02:04:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Burlington]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Community Building]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Front Porch Forum]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Local Online]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neighborhood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Social Networking]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vermont]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://frontporchforum.com/blog/?p=1548</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Posted on FPF by Susie in South #BTV today&#8230; My lovely, large and luxuriant kitty, Dulce Meow, has been on a diet for months and is getting even LARGER! If you see her on the street and she begs you to buy her an ice cream from the Good Humor man (or woman), please don&#8217;t [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Posted on FPF by Susie in South #BTV today&#8230;</p>
<blockquote><p>My lovely, large and luxuriant kitty, Dulce Meow, has been on a diet for months and is getting even LARGER! If you see her on the street and she begs you to buy her an ice cream from the Good Humor man (or woman), please don&#8217;t do it. If she shows up at your doorstep and convinces you that she is starving, don&#8217;t believe her, SHE LIES! Dulce has a very compelling look in her large green eyes but you must refrain from feeding her, please, not even a small treat, SHE IS NOT PREGNANT!</p>
<p>Thank you in advance for your help. She&#8217;s a sweet, very fat, kitty and I want her to live a good long life.<br />
Your neighbor, Susie</p></blockquote>
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		<title>One innovative solution to two vexing neighborhood problems</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2010/10/06/one-innovative-solution-to-two-vexing-neighborhood-problems/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2010/10/06/one-innovative-solution-to-two-vexing-neighborhood-problems/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Oct 2010 18:32:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Civic Engagement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Front Porch Forum]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neighborhood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neighborhood Watch]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://frontporchforum.com/blog/?p=1510</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Speeding cars and dog poop.  We see postings on those two topics nearly every day in one neighborhood or another on Front Porch Forum.  Well, at last, thanks to a fast-thinking Massachusetts woman, we may have a single solution (Burlington Free Press, Oct. 6, 2010)&#8230; Belmont, Mass. &#8212; A Massachusetts woman is facing assault charges [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Speeding cars and dog poop.  We see postings on those two topics nearly every day in one neighborhood or another on <a title="Helping neighbors connect." href="http://frontporchforum.com">Front Porch Forum</a>.  Well, at last, thanks to a fast-thinking Massachusetts woman, we may have a single solution (<a href="http://burlingtonfreepress.com">Burlington Free Press</a>, Oct. 6, 2010)&#8230;</p>
<blockquote><p>Belmont, Mass. &#8212; A Massachusetts woman is facing assault charges after Belmont police said she hit a motorist in the face with a bag of dog feces.</p>
<p>Police said Tuesday that the woman, whose name has not been released, admitted tossing doggie dung at the drive because she believed he was speeding.</p>
<p>The woman was charged with assault and battery with a dangerous weapon, vandalism to property and disorderly conduct. No arraignment date has been set.</p></blockquote>
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		<title>Pink-clad Catnapper Roaming #BTV #VT Old North End?</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2010/09/17/pink-clad-catnapper-roaming-btv-vt-old-north-end/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2010/09/17/pink-clad-catnapper-roaming-btv-vt-old-north-end/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 17 Sep 2010 20:38:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Burlington]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Civic Engagement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Community Building]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Front Porch Forum]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Local Online]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Media]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neighborhood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neighborhood Watch]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[social capital]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Vermont]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://frontporchforum.com/blog/?p=1459</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Lauren Ober blogged today on Seven Days&#8217; Blurt&#8230; O. N.E. Cat Snatcher on the Loose &#8211; From the Bureau of Are You Friggin&#8217; Kidding Me? According to Front Porch Forum, there&#8217;s a cat nabber on the loose (pussy pillager, perhaps?) in the Old North End. Read on to hear the tragic tale of Beansie, stolen [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Lauren Ober blogged today on <a href="http://7d.blogs.com/blurt/2010/09/cat-snatcher-on-the-loose.html">Seven Days&#8217; Blurt</a>&#8230;</p>
<p><strong>O. N.E. Cat Snatcher on the Loose &#8211; From the Bureau of Are You Friggin&#8217; Kidding Me?</strong><br />
According to <a title="Helping neighbors connect." href="http://frontporchforum.com">Front Porch Forum</a>, there&#8217;s a cat nabber on the loose (pussy pillager, perhaps?) in the Old North End. Read on to hear the tragic tale of Beansie, stolen right out of his own yard.</p>
<blockquote><p>SEEKING FLUFFY ORANGE CAT STOLEN BY WOMAN IN PINK<br />
Wed, 15 September 2010</p>
<p>Around 1:30 Tuesday afternoon, Sept 14th, a woman wearing a pink sweatsuit was seen entering my yard and stealing my large, soft, long-haired orange cat, who tried to resist. The woman was then seen trotting down Blodgett Street to North Street carrying my kitty. She is identified as white, approximately 5&#8217;5&#8243; tall with brownish hair, stocky build, wearing pink sweats. My kitty, Beansie, is 6-years old, may have some Maine Coon cat in him and weighs about 14 lbs.</p>
<p>There&#8217;s a $200 reward for information leading to the safe return of my beloved cat.</p>
<p>Please spread the word! Thank you!!! And thanks to all my wonderful neighbors who are helping!</p></blockquote>
<p>First, let&#8217;s talk about how it&#8217;s sort of amazing that this woman in the pink sweatsuit could jog down the block carrying a 14-pound cat. I couldn&#8217;t jog down the block without or without a squirming cat. Second, let&#8217;s talk about how Beansie put up a fight. Good for him. I hope he scratched the crap out of the pink sweatsuit lady. Meow!</p>
<p>If anyone has any info about Beansie or the thief, contact FPF or the Burlington Police Department at 658-2704.</p>
<blockquote><p>UPDATE, 9/17: We&#8217;ve received word that Beanzie the cat has come back.</p>
<p>BEANZIE appeared on my doorstep this morning and seems fine overall, slightly stressed, but very happy to be home after his ordeal. We figure he either escaped or was let go by the woman who took him after a high profile neighborhood effort to find him.</p>
<p>Thank you to all who sent good vibes and/or lent a hand in the search for Beanzie!</p>
<p>Thank you Front Porch Forum for providing the means to get word out fast. And extra special thanks for the incredible outpouring of support and help from friends and neighbors on Blodgett, North, Pitkin, and Strong Street, my incredible and dedicated co-workers at Champlain Housing Trust, and the many small businesses on North Street who will be getting more of my patronage in the future!</p>
<p>p. s. Many thanks to the Burlington Police Department, and especially Officer Navari, who showed compassion and diligence while investigating a few leads to try to find the Cat Burglar in the North Street area. Beanzie and I are very grateful!</p>
<p>Oh happy day!</p></blockquote>
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		<title>Must-read posting about&#8230; Free toaster</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2009/12/04/must-read-posting-about-free-toaster/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2009/12/04/must-read-posting-about-free-toaster/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 05 Dec 2009 04:00:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Burlington]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Community Building]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Local Online]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://frontporchforum.com/blog/?p=1053</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I haven&#8217;t laughed this hard in awhile.  From Matt Gang in Burlington&#8217;s Old North End tonight on Front Porch Forum&#8230; Free toaster Are you tired of your trust worthy toaster, tirelessly toasting your toast to the desired toastiness? Boring!!! Are you ready for an adventure? My toaster won&#8217;t let you down. You won&#8217;t start every [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I haven&#8217;t laughed this hard in awhile.  From Matt Gang in Burlington&#8217;s Old North End tonight on <a title="Helping neighbors connect." href="http://frontporchforum.com">Front Porch Forum</a>&#8230;</p>
<blockquote><p><strong>Free toaster</strong></p>
<p>Are you tired of your trust worthy toaster, tirelessly toasting your toast to the desired toastiness? Boring!!!</p>
<p>Are you ready for an adventure? My toaster won&#8217;t let you down. You won&#8217;t start every morning with loud expletives and a smoked filled kitchen, just enough mornings to keep you constantly paranoid, and your neighbors heavily invested in fire insurance. Yes sir, the folks at Silex Proctor really broke the mold with this one. This toaster doesn&#8217;t view it&#8217;s temp. dial as an order, more as a suggestion. Sometimes brown means it will burn your bread product to a point that would require dental records for identification. At other times brown means the moment after you exit the kitchen, it will fling the still white bread into the stratosphere. Sometimes brown means that it won&#8217;t even accept the toast, preferring to make a loud buzzing noise whenever it&#8217;s overly sensitive lever is depressed.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m sure that at this point most everyone is just waiting for information on where to pick up this little beauty, but my conscience requires me to unearth a few of it&#8217;s less redeeming qualities.</p>
<p>This toaster is possessed by several malignant spirits.<br />
It may be a portal to hell.<br />
It cannot stand bagels, british muffins, or any other bread products come to think of it.<br />
It can shoot flames as far as it can hurl fiery hunks of crust.</p>
<p>Please, please, please, take my toaster. I&#8217;m afraid of what will happen if I throw it out. Don&#8217;t tell it that I wrote this.</p></blockquote>
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		<title>Cheapatopia&#8230; by Dilbert&#8217;s Scott Adams</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2009/07/27/cheapatopia-by-dilberts-scott-adams/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2009/07/27/cheapatopia-by-dilberts-scott-adams/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 27 Jul 2009 16:33:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Civic Engagement]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://frontporchforum.com/blog/?p=899</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The urge to build community with those nearby is a strong impule for many people&#8230; and lots of folks seem to realize that neighbor connection has declined.  Friend Nik just shared this blog post from Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert.  He calls it Cheapatopia.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The urge to build community with those nearby is a strong impule for many people&#8230; and lots of folks seem to realize that neighbor connection has declined.  Friend Nik just shared <a href="http://www.dilbert.com/blog/entry/cheapatopia__internet">this blog post</a> from Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert.  He calls it <a href="http://www.dilbert.com/blog/entry/cheapatopia__internet">Cheapatopia</a>.</p>
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		<title>If I had a raffle entry for every year&#8230; Here are the winners!</title>
		<link>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2009/07/02/fpf-raffle-winners-and-130-compelling-entries/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.frontporchforum.com/2009/07/02/fpf-raffle-winners-and-130-compelling-entries/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Jul 2009 06:53:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Community Building]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Community Management]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Front Porch Forum]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://frontporchforum.com/blog/?p=892</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Congratulations to the eight winners of the Front Porch Forum raffle to celebrate Lake Champlain&#8217;s Quadracentennial.  Here are their entries and the event to which they won a pair of tickets&#8230; If I had twenty pounds of &#8220;Willis&#8221; for every year since Samuel de Champlain saw Lake Champlain, I would have a &#8220;Willis-ton&#8221;.  -Kathy Rude, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Congratulations to the eight winners of the <a href="http://frontporchforum.com/blog/2009/06/30/fpf-raffle-quadricentennial-edition-enter-by-july-1">Front Porch Forum raffle</a> to celebrate Lake Champlain&#8217;s Quadracentennial.  Here are their entries and the event to which they won a pair of tickets&#8230;</p>
<ul>
<li>If I had <span style="text-decoration: underline;">twenty pounds of &#8220;Willis&#8221;</span> for every year since Samuel de Champlain saw Lake Champlain, I would have <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a &#8220;Willis-ton&#8221;</span>.  -Kathy Rude, Williston &#8211; July 5 &#8211; <a href="http://celebratechamplain.org/content/view/175/123">The Roots</a></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>If I had <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a moment</span> for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have <span style="text-decoration: underline;">not yet enough time to say good bye</span>.  -Lisa McGuire, Richmond &#8211; July 5/6/7 &#8211; <a href="http://celebratechamplain.org/content/view/175/123">Only Drunks &amp; Children Tell the Truth</a></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>If I had <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a New Love</span> for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have <span style="text-decoration: underline;">Big Trouble</span>.  -William Muzzy, Shelburne &#8211; July 7 &#8211; <a href="http://highergroundmusic.com/calendar/show/3219">King Sunny Ade</a></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>If I had <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a day</span> for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a little girl who got to meet her Grandpa before he died of lung cancer</span>.  -Lisa Seymour, Milton &#8211; July 8 &#8211; <a href="http://celebratechamplain.org/content/view/175/123">Counterpoint</a></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>If I had <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a side</span> for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a quadradecadecagon</span>.  -David Fontaine, Hinesburg &#8211; July 9/10/11 &#8211; <a href="http://celebratechamplain.org/content/view/175/123">Territoires Feminins</a></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>If I had <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a way to eliminate 65 nuclear warheads</span> for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, Id have <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a planet with no nuclear weapons</span>!  -Naomi Almeleh, Burlington &#8211; July 11 &#8211; <a href="http://highergroundmusic.com/calendar/show/3248">Ween</a></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>If I had <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a hamburger</span> for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I <span style="text-decoration: underline;">could have solved the Lake&#8217;s agricultural pollution problems</span>!  -Don Meals, Burlington &#8211; July 12 &#8211; <a href="http://celebratechamplain.org/content/view/175/123">Water Music</a></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>If I had <span style="text-decoration: underline;">a penny</span> for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have <span style="text-decoration: underline;">two large creemes at Al&#8217;s</span>.  -Matthew Griffes, South Burlington &#8211; July 13/14 &#8211; <a href="http://celebratechamplain.org/content/view/175/123">Aurelia&rsquo;s Oratorio</a></li>
</ul>
<p>Thanks to our sponsors: Higher Ground, Burlington International Waterfront Festival and Burlington City Arts! Learn more about the Quadricentennial at <a href="http://www.celebratechamplain.org/">http://www.celebratechamplain.org</a></p>
<p>And here are many of the other entries.  Thanks to all who participated.</p>
<ul>
<li>If I had a <a title="Helping neighbors connect." href="http://frontporchforum.com">Front Porch Forum</a> neighbor for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a very big community of friends.</li>
<li>If I had 162 MILLION DOLLARS for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have NEARLY ENOUGH MONEY TO REIMBURSE THE 8,000 PEOPLE SWINDLED BY MADOFF.</li>
<li>If I had a thousand dollars for every year since Samuel de Champlain firstsaw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a house on Lakeview Terrace!</li>
<li>If I had a lollipop for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have two very happy kids!</li>
<li>If I had a dollar for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, i would still be short ten dollars for one months rent.</li>
<li>If I had a beaver pelt for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a hard time explaining it to the Fish and Game Dept.</li>
<li>If I had to listen to F-16&#8242;s take off for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have gone crazy. <img src='http://blog.frontporchforum.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </li>
<li>If I had a 17 billion gallons of water for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough to fill another Lake Champlain!</li>
<li>If I had a miniature donkey for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a whole lot of poop.</li>
<li>If I had a balloon full of helium for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough lift to take my couch (and my dog) on a floating tour of the Old North End. (assuming 3ft diameter balloons, 120 pounds of furniture, 230 pounds of person and dog, correct calculations, and a favorable breeze)</li>
<li>If I had a letter for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough for 2.86 tweets.</li>
<li>If I had a smile for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have our wonderful five sisters neighborhood!</li>
<li>If I had a vacation day at a ranch in Crawford, Texas for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have been President of the United States for eight years&#8230;</li>
<li>If I had a pint of blueberries for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have plenty of blueberry pies to share with my Front Porch Forum neighbors.</li>
<li>If I had a MOTOR BOAT for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have MY VERY OWN CHARTER SERVICE. (I&#8217;d be the &#8220;Skipper&#8221;, Tim would be my &#8220;First Mate&#8221; and &#8220;Max&#8221; would be our &#8220;Mascot&#8221;. Any takers for &#8220;The Millionaire and his wife&#8221;, &#8220;The Movie Star&#8221;, &#8220;The Professor&#8221; or &#8220;Mary Ann&#8221;)</li>
<li>If I had a FRENCH FRY for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have HEARTBURN.</li>
<li>If I had a gallon of sap from a sugar maple tree for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw the Lake, I&#8217;d have 10 gallons of maple syrup.</li>
<li>If I had a pothole for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have Ledgemere Street <img src='http://blog.frontporchforum.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_wink.gif' alt=';)' class='wp-smiley' /> </li>
<li>If I had someone who wanted a pail of topsoil for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough to get rid of the pile of top soil taking up space on the blue tarp next to 117 N. Champlain Street. Please come and take it! Thanks!</li>
<li>If I had 1 foot for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw lake Champlain I&#8217;d have the bottom of the lake.</li>
<li>If I had a fox or coyote for every year since Samuel de Champlain saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have only half the wildlife in Orchard Neighborhood spotted in 2009.</li>
<li>If I had a share of stock in Green Mountain Coffee Roasters for every year since Samuel de Champlain saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough money to go to the Turks and Caicos : )</li>
<li>If I had a leg for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have four centipedes.</li>
<li>If I had a THREAD for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have A GREAT SET OF SHEETS!</li>
<li>If I had a weed for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have my garden!</li>
<li>If I had a knick-knack for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a lawn sale.</li>
<li>If I had a 0.00785398163th for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a piece of the &#8220;pi&#8221;! <img src='http://blog.frontporchforum.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </li>
<li>If I had a smile for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have my life in Burlington.</li>
<li>If I had a zebra mussel for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, my water line would be clogged.</li>
<li>If I had a house for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have the slated Larkin development in the Southeast quadrant (almost).</li>
<li>If I had a Champ sighting for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have to have had a lot of cocktails&#8230;</li>
<li>If I had a monkey for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a big mess.</li>
<li>If I had a clever idea for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a pretty good chance of winning this raffle.</li>
<li>If I had a quilt for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough to give a quilt to 1 out of every 10 homeless people in Vermont.</li>
<li>If I had a pickle for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have barrel of pickles.</li>
<li>If I had a rose for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have the gardens of Versailles.</li>
<li>If I had one representative like Bernie Sanders in Congress for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have single payer health care this year for ever man, woman and child in the United States at a fraction of the cost of our current system that leaves so many people uncovered or partially covered.</li>
<li>If I had a gallon of road salt for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have sea lamprey in my estuaries.</li>
<li>If I had a BEER for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have A FRAT PARTY.</li>
<li>If I had a pint sized canning jar for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have have enough jars can jam for the whole neighborhood! I&#8217;m looking jam size canning jars if anyone has some they no longer use! I&#8217;m planning to make lots of berry jam this summer to give as wedding gifts next spring <img src='http://blog.frontporchforum.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </li>
<li>If I had a Arquebus for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have an Ancient Weapons Museum!</li>
<li>If I had a fish for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a school.</li>
<li>If I had a dollar for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a night out on the town in Richmond.</li>
<li>If I had a KID for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have JFK ELEMENTARY SCHOOL IN WINOOSKI.</li>
<li>If I had an onion for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have an onion city called Winooski.</li>
<li>If I had a PIECE OF BACON for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have DANGEROUSLY HIGH CHOLESTEROL LEVELS.</li>
<li>If I had ONE MILLION DOLLARS for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have ENOUGH MONEY TO COVER MICHAEL JACKSON&#8217;S DEBT. and if you think that&#8217;s a lot&#8230;</li>
<li>If I had an inch of snow for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d be in Skiers&#8217; Heaven!!!</li>
<li>This one is from Ethan&#8230; If I had a Rock for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a Rock Garden.</li>
<li>If I had a Lake Monsters game for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have 400 Lake Monsters games to attend at Centennial Field!</li>
<li>If I had an acre of land in Charlotte for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d give it all to Habitat for Humanity to build affordable housing with LOTS of Common Land.</li>
<li>If I had a dollar for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough money to purchase something wonderful from all the excellent vendors at the Williston Farmer&#8217;s Market.</li>
<li>If I had a rain barrel for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough rain to supply one inch of water to all of Archibald Neighborhood Garden&#8217;s plots for 58 weeks (assuming my math is correct).</li>
<li>If I had an ounce of power for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have all sidewalks and streets fixed in Burlington so pedestrians could be safe.</li>
<li>If I had a square for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have: 20 squared squares.</li>
<li>If I had a plane ticket for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a lot of adventures. Or one adventure with 399 friends.</li>
<li>If I had a dead indian for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a big graveyard.</li>
<li>If I had a couple of degrees for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough heat to clean my oven!</li>
<li>If I had a squirrel for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have my backyard on a good day. <img src='http://blog.frontporchforum.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_wink.gif' alt=';)' class='wp-smiley' /> </li>
<li>If I had a half a mind for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a head that&#8217;s 200 times bigger.</li>
<li>If I had 1 gallon of sap for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw lake Champlain I&#8217;d have 10 gallons of maple syrup.</li>
<li>If I had a tray of brownies for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have to consume 1,152,000 calories!</li>
<li>If I had a rabbit for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have Vermont overrun by rabbits.</li>
<li>If I had a pair of hands for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a gang sufficient to prepare the rail causeway for full-time ferry service across the cut, linking the Burlington bikepath and points south with the Champlain Islands and points north.</li>
<li>If I had a friend for every year since Samuel de Champlain firs saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a neighborhood.</li>
<li>If I had a peeper for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a symphony.</li>
<li>If I had a drum of VT maple syrup for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain I&#8217;d have enough to send 22 gallons with every VT Nat. Guard Soldier headed to Afghanistan this winter to enjoy and share with their hosts.</li>
<li>If I had a mature tree planted around Burlington for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have 19,200 pounds of carbon dioxide absorbed each year and release enough oxygen back into the atmosphere to support 800 human beings.</li>
<li>If I had a MENTOR for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have REACHED MOBIUS&#8217; GOAL OF OVER 1,200 MENTORS FOR KIDS IN CHITTENDEN COUNTY</li>
<li>If I had a fruit or vegetable for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have the Intervale.</li>
<li>If I had an acre for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a much longer walk to get the mail.</li>
<li>If I had a champ sighting for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a cottage industry bigger than BigFoot.</li>
<li>If I had a Champ for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have my own Lake Jurassic.</li>
<li>If I had a tree for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have Eastwoods Forest.</li>
<li>If I had a BABY CHAMP for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have LAKE FULL OF MONSTERS.</li>
<li>If I had a TREE for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a FOREST in Pinewood Neighborhood park!</li>
<li>If I had a tree for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a nice little forest</li>
<li>If I had a grad for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have experienced one revolutionary year.</li>
<li>If i had A TOE for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw lake champlain, i&#8217;d have an 80 foot stride.</li>
<li>If I had a tomato for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have tasty salsa all winter long.</li>
<li>If I had a dollar for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have the new (to me) computer I want! But, seriously&#8230; does anyone have an older laptop they aren&#8217;t using anymore (that you&#8217;d like to get rid of at a very reasonable price?)? My desktop is dying and I&#8217;m moving into a much smaller place and would like a laptop to save space&#8230;I just can&#8217;t afford to go out and buy new. I&#8217;m not going to use it for anything too extreme&#8230;just some internet surfing, document prep and email&#8230;maybe a few pictures. If you have something you aren&#8217;t using and you&#8217;d like to pass along to someone who would really appreciate it and get a lot of use out of it&#8230; I&#8217;d be interested in hearing what you may have and what you&#8217;re asking for it. Thanks much!</li>
<li>If I had a nickel for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a lot of nickels.</li>
<li>If I had a BICYCLE MILE for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have A PRETTY GOOD RIDE.</li>
<li>If I had a CAT for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have A CAT-ASTROPHE.</li>
<li>If I had a house on Airport Drive and listened to F-16&#8242;s take off for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have gone crazy. There &#8211; that&#8217;s better!! <img src='http://blog.frontporchforum.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </li>
<li>If I had a birthday candle for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a serious conflagration.</li>
<li>If I had an APPLE TREE for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have ONE BIG ORCHARD. Remember folks, if you don&#8217;t win the raffle you can still get a FREE concert ticket to one of the shows below by VOLUNTEERING for 4+ hours for the quad! Go to the website (google it or find it from the city of Burlington&#8217;s webpage) to learn more and sign up! Volunteers also receive a free t-shirt.</li>
<li>If I had a phosphorous reduction plan in place for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a supper duper clean lake to swim in!</li>
<li>If I had a dragon boat for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a beautiful regatta.</li>
<li>If I had a Tree for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a Forest. <img src='http://blog.frontporchforum.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':-)' class='wp-smiley' /> </li>
<li>If I had a new car for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I would have a junk yard.</li>
<li>If I had a candle for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I would have peace in the world.</li>
<li>If I had a dollar for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have $400 dollars.</li>
<li>If I had a wild black raspberry for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a nice, full belly and maybe a pie or two.</li>
<li>If I had a FISH for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have A WHALE OF A GOOD FISH FRY TO CELEBRATE THE PAST 400 YEARS.</li>
<li>If I had a lobster for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a big neighborhood cookout!</li>
<li>If I had a dinner for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a start in feeding the hungry in our City.</li>
<li>I do not know how to copy and paste . Here is my entree: If I had a Friend for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain I&#8217;d have RICHES BEYOND COMPARE.</li>
<li>If I had a note for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a song.</li>
<li>If I had a day off for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have enough time to sail around the world for a year.</li>
<li>if i had a camera for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw lake Champlain I&#8217;d have a lot of pictures.</li>
<li>If I had a pea for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have pea soup.</li>
<li>If I had a WAVE for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have A GREAT DAY OF SURFING.</li>
<li>If I had a flower for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a stunning yard well worth whiling away the hours in. (A worthy goal!)</li>
<li>If I had ten strands of hair for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a hairdo like Farrah Fawcett.</li>
<li>If I had a bag of cement for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have almost enough to fill all the potholes in Burlington.</li>
<li>If I had a MIRACLE for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have HEAVEN ON EARTH.</li>
<li>If I had a coyote for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a pack of coyotes.</li>
<li>If I had a stone for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have my So. Starksboro garden.</li>
<li>If I had one deer tick for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have 400 deer ticks to destroy.</li>
<li>If I had a refreshing beverage for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have party.</li>
<li>If I had a smile for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a great summer home with my new baby boy.</li>
<li>If I had a new photo for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a big fat photo book on Lake Champlain.</li>
<li>If I had a helium balloon for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a way to fly around in the sky.</li>
<li>If I had a toe for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have trouble walking.</li>
<li>If I had a songbird for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have an sweet cacophony that you would all love.</li>
<li>If I had a grapevine for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a vineyard Chantal-14 Elizabeth (the one with the grape vines:))</li>
<li>If I had a day off for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have a year plus 35 days of vacation.</li>
<li>If I had a penny for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have four dollars.</li>
<li>If I had a picture of a snowflake for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have Snowflake Bentley&#8217;s Collection in my home.</li>
<li>If I had a green-up bag and a person help pick litter for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, we&#8217;d all have an even MORE beautiful New North End.</li>
<li>If I had a BLOCK PARTY for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I&#8217;d have FUN with a Capital F.</li>
<li>If I had a song for every year since Samuel de Champlain first saw Lake Champlain, I would be able to sing a different song every day of the year, and share the extras!</li>
</ul>
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